December 4th, 2003

You Rot

Companies are getting sneakier with these promotional sweepstakes. It used to be that you could open the package to find out a) There is some sort of contest and b) You didn’t win it. Not so anymore.

I’ve had a package of Dentyne Ice gum (spearmint, in case you were wondering) for a while now, and the package is proclaiming some sort of contest. It doesn’t even tell you what the possible prizes are, it just says you need to go to their website, enter in this 12-digit code and your e-mail address, and you’ll get an e-mail telling you whether or not you won. This seems like a lot of work to me, but I do it anyway because you can win dinner and a couple of movie tickets.

So I get an e-mail in a minute or so with the blaring subject line of “SPARK A LITTLE ROMANCE WITH DENTYNE FIRE AND DENTYNE ICE GUM SWEEPSTAKES.” All-caps is never a good sign, in my opinion. So I open it up to find this message:

SORRY. YOU ARE NOT A WINNER.

Please try again.

Click here to see Official Rules.

That’s it. That’s the whole message. I spent several minutes of my life to be told by a faceless corporation that I am a loser. Like I needed that to start my day. Sheesh.

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